


Where's that self control that you preach

by screamtobeheard



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Friends to Lovers, M/M, Pining, Sexual Tension, i guess romantic tension too, michael is in jeremy hell
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-02
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-22 13:42:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11381367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/screamtobeheard/pseuds/screamtobeheard
Summary: See here’s where it all went wrong. All was well until these very inconvenient and very inappropriate thoughts about Jeremy would pop into his head. But it was fine. It was totally FINE! Because he wasn’t going to act on them. He wasn’t. It seemed such a simple rule but then Jeremy decided to make it a little harder.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Guess who's back, back again  
> with a new fandom  
> tell a friend

Michael had already joined the squad for lunch before Jeremy got there. He’d slowly gotten attached to the loud bunch and gotten fairly close to Rich, who was sitting to his left. The seat to his right was saved for Jeremy, as it usually was. Everyone was having conversations of their own; Christine with Jenna, Jake with Rich, Brooke with Chloe and Michael was content with silence as he ate his sandwich. This was disrupted once Jeremy threw himself on the seat next to him with red cheeks.  
“Where have you been?” Jenna asked him.  
“And why are you red?” Rich added with a snort. Jeremy huffed and handed Michael a cold slushie. He had another one in his hand and took a sip from his own as he calmed down.  
“Had a bit of a run,” Jeremy said. Michael raised an eyebrow.  
“You run?” This earned him a shove.

The conversations slowly quieted until there was a silence and a giggle from Brooke. Michael searched for the cause, as he noticed Rich staring at the two slushies.  
“Did you run to get that?” he questioned with a smug smile. Jeremy’s face went red again.  
“Maybe.” Brooke and Jenna started laughing and Christine also smiled.  
“Jeremy you can’t just bring only one person a slushie at a table of 8!” Chloe told him. Rich snorted loudly, trying to cover it up with his hand smothering his mouth. Michael kicked his shin lightly, to which Rich gave him a betrayed look. 

Jeremy was opening and closing his mouth uselessly before settling for a high pitched:  
“Yes I can!” Christine patted Jeremy’s shoulder sympathetically.  
“Yes you can, it’s a nice thing to do,” she said. Chloe again protested but with a giggle.  
“It’s not a nice thing not to bring us one too!”  
“It is a nice thing for me though. Sucks to be you, you greedy fuck,” Michael teased. He took a long exaggerated sip and let out a long moan.  
“Hmmm, Chloe you have no idea how good this is!” Chloe sighed but with a smile.  
“You two are the worst. Now I want one as well.” Michael giggled before turning to Jeremy, who hadn’t said anything again and was quietly sipping his slushie with pink cheeks.  
“Thank you for the slushie,” Michael told him softly. Jeremy smiled brightly.  
“You’re welcome,” he said just as softly, showing off his blue coloured mouth. Jake pointed it out and Jeremy’s head turned bright red again.

Michael smiled fondly. The blue food colouring on his tongue was adorable. And he secretly wondered what it would be like to taste it. Wait. See here’s where it all went wrong. All was well until these very inconvenient and very inappropriate thoughts about Jeremy would pop into his head. But it was fine. It was totally FINE! Because he wasn’t going to act on them. He wasn’t. It seemed such a simple rule but then Jeremy decided to make it a little harder.

 

*  
Jeremy asked him to go to the movies with him the other day.  
“No one wants to see it with me, everyone’s already seen it apparently,” he had whined and asked Michael to come with him. So Michael drove them to the movie theatre that night. Jeremy wore a blue button up which looked so good on him the only thing Michael was able to say was:  
“Well you have other clothes after all!” Jeremy had rolled his eyes and got into the car. Jeremy bought them a big popcorn as he claimed it was more convenient than to buy two separate. Michael agreed and forced himself not to think about how Jeremy would touch his hand accidentally every few minutes. 20 minutes into the movie, Michael realised he should have asked Jeremy what the film was about in the first place.

“It’s won an Oscar, so I had to see it because everyone has seen it already,” Jeremy had whispered back, though there were only 4 other people. The rest of the movie was good, and they watched it quietly. It wasn’t until the two characters were sitting together on the beach that Michael began feeling uneasy. This also was the moment that Jeremy turned his face towards him as the characters leaned in.  
“They’re gonna kiss,” he whispered excitedly. Michael mimicked his excitement and looked back at the screen, where things had moved on pretty fast. Michael’s entire body felt on fire as he sneaked a look at Jeremy whose face was red, which made it even worse. After the most awkward handjob scene and where Michael had barely breathed, Jeremy looked at him again, cheeks still pink,  
“Well,” he whispered. “They finally kissed.” Michael snorted.  
“Pretty sure they didn’t do just that,” he added. Jeremy snorted but Michael didn’t miss the way he blushed again.

He was too cute for his own good. Michael wondered what he had done to deserve this. To be alone in a cinema with Jeremy next to him, sharing pop corn and watching a gay movie that won an Oscar. He glanced at Jeremy, who was again staring intensely at the screen. He let his mind wander, just for a little bit, to what it would be like to kiss him. To lean over in the dark cinema and kiss him, like the two on the screen had done. He let himself for just a second wonder about how his lips would feel, how Jeremy would blush, how he would react. And after that wonderful, hopeful second, he forced himself to stop thinking about it again. He pushed the butterflies back in their cage and focussed on the screen. 

“Sooooo what did you think?” Michael asked him. Jeremy hummed, and put on his seatbelt.  
“It was good,” he said simply. Michael waited for him to continue.  
“I mean, I’m glad they found each other,” he added awkwardly.  
“Like after everything they’ve been through. Even though Kevin was an ass in the past. I’m glad they’re together after everything and Chiron’s happy now,” Jeremy finished. Michael wasn’t sure he was breathing. Things they’ve been through, someone being an ass in the past, finding each other again. Yes, great movie, luckily he couldn’t relate. Because that would make it even harder for his heart to take. Good thing he could not relate. At all.  
Michael realised he hadn’t responded to Jeremy as Jeremy sighed.

“You think it’s dumb. You probably hated it,” Jeremy murmured.  
“What, no, I didn’t hate it!” he rushed out quickly. Jeremy smiled sadly.  
“You don’t have to say that just because it’s me.” Michael shoved him playfully.  
“I don’t do shit just because it’s you, Heere,” he lied. Jeremy scrunched his nose up in amusement.  
“I suppose you won’t drive me home then?”  
“I only drive you home because it’s convenient. Not because it’s you,” Michael told him. Jeremy laughed as Michael started driving. 

**  
The next time Michael suffered was after a much too long game that went on until 1am.  
“I’ll text my dad I’m staying over, if you don’t mind,” Jeremy told him.  
“I never mind, my dude,” Michael responded from his place on the ground. Michael had dumped his spare blanket and pillow on Jeremy’s head when Jeremy refused to move. Jeremy groaned.  
“I’m too tired to move. Can I sleep right here?” he whined like a little kid. Michael scoffed and kicked Jeremy’s side.  
“Jeremy in the morning will hate you for it when he waked up with pain everywhere,” Michael told him. Jeremy grumbled in response.  
“I don’t give a fuck about me in the morning. I only care about me right now.” Michael chuckled.  
“Get up, Jeremy,” he told him. He hadn’t expected the way Jeremy scrambled up so quickly it was like he’d been shocked. 

Michael tensed. Jeremy stared at him with wide shocked eyes before the realisation dawned on him. He sat down quietly with wide scared eyes. And then Michael realised what happened. Jeremy had confused him with his squip. Michael lowered himself to sit down next to Jeremy.

“I’m sorry,” Michael told him.  
“It’s fine,” Jeremy said, as if he was expecting his apology. “I’m sorry for freaking out.” Michael shook his head, and cautiously reached out to touch the back of his hand.  
“I’m sorry for saying it like an order. It’s okay to freak out every now and then,” he said softly. Jeremy smiled sadly and nodded. He took Michael’s hand in his and squeezed quickly.  
“It’s fine, let’s forget about it. Can I borrow something to sleep in?”  
As Jeremy went to the bathroom to change, Michael lay in his bed thinking about how often this must happen to Jeremy, to Rich, to all of them. He had seen the scars on Jeremy’s back but Jeremy had brushed him off easily, telling him it was no big deal. It was a big deal to Michael. Jeremy quietly opened his bedroom door in one of his t shirts that are too big on Jeremy’s small body. It was sliding of his one shoulder and Michael had to count to 10 just at the sight.

“Hey, this is going to sound weird…,” Jeremy started. He looked at Michael shyly with a small blush on his cheeks. “Can I sleep with you?”  
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10  
“In my bed?” Michael tried to say in a casual voice. Jeremy nodded. Michael’s heart skipped a beat.  
“Sure,” he made place for Jeremy to climb in, and he did, facing him as he did. The light next to Michael’s bed was still on. Jeremy shuffled closer to Michael and his cold feet touched Michael’s bare leg. He pushed his face into the pillow and looked up at Michael with a sleepy smile.  
“Can you turn off the light?” Michael had forgotten to function ever since Jeremy got into his bed.  
“You come into my house, into my bed, and I have to turn off the lights?” he said in mock offense. Jeremy simply nodded. Michael sighed but did anyway. He heard Jeremy let out a breathy chuckle in the dark room.

“The things I do for you Heere,” he said, though it sounded fond as he said it.  
“Just because it’s me,” Jeremy whispered back. Michael bit his lip to keep himself from smiling. As he closed his eyes and tried to push the butterflies in their cage, Jeremy moved closer. His head rested against Michael’s chest gently, carefully.  
“This okay?” he asked, warm breath against Michael’s chest. Michael swallowed, and briefly worried if Jeremy could feel his hammering heart. He nodded, however, and Jeremy pushed himself even closer, until he was pressed completely against Michael’s chest. Michael ran a hand through Jeremy’s hair gently. Jeremy let out a content noise. A few minutes later, his breathing evened out and Michael lay wide awake. He loved being this close to Jeremy. He wanted this. He wanted this so so bad it hurt. It hurt that Jeremy let him do this, that he wanted to be close to him too. It hurt that Michael had him in his arms and he had to accept that was all that would happen. He closed his eyes and wished for his heart to calm down. 

***  
“Hey, you okay?” Michael had zoned out and he looked at Rich, who was staring at him.  
“Huh?”  
“I asked if you were alright,” Rich repeated. Michael nodded quickly putting his headphones on his head. Rich knocked them off quickly. Michael cursed at him.  
“What’s your problem?” he complained. Michael was in a bad mood, that part was clear. He hadn’t been sleeping well and now Rich was bothering him as well.  
“You can tell me, you know,” Rich urged. Michael hummed in reply. He rested his head on his arms on the table and closed his eyes. Rich was quiet for a bit and Michael thought he left for a moment before he spoke again.

“Is this about Jeremy?” A pause.  
“What about Jeremy?” Michael murmured back. Rich slammed his hands on the table excitedly. Michael made a noise in protest and glared at Rich’s beaming face.  
“It is about Jeremy!” he squealed. Michael tried to play it cool.  
“What is? I told I’m fine,” he tried. Rich gave him a knowing look.  
“I knew it, I knew it all along.”

Michael punched his arm.  
“You know nothing.” Rich winced in pain but still wouldn’t shut up.  
“You know, I’m sure I’m pretty good at giving advice, I could help you,” he said excitedly.  
“I don’t need help!” Michael cut him off. “Because there’s nothing to help me with. Jeremy and I are friends and that’s all we’ll be.” Rich hummed. He was quiet for a bit.  
“You don’t want to make a move?” Michael shook his head. Rich huffed.  
“Damn, alright then. Must be hard for you, the way he’s treating you and all.” Michael counted to 10.  
“He’s so cute with you, I mean. Goes out of his way to do nice things for you, looks pretty good lately too, his hair looks nice. And the way you guys are always hugging and touching, I’d probably already have gone insane.”  
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10  
“Actually, I’m perfectly fine,” Michael lied through gritted teeth. Rich nodded sympathetically and patted his shoulder.  
“Yeah, you’ll be okay. But if you’ll go insane, you know where to find me.” 

Don’t worry, Michael thought, I won’t need to.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi friends  
> not gonna lie this whole fic was written just for that car scene  
> Hope you like it. My headcanon is that rich and michael are very good friends 
> 
> also (listen to ed sheeran when it talks about ed ok)

Little did Michael know, it only got worse from here. Jeremy’s dad was out for the day, doing something with his colleagues, as Jeremy had told him. Mr. Heere was doing much better, and Michael noticed this making Jeremy happier as well.  
“Are you coming over tonight? I don’t want to eat alone,” Jeremy had asked him. Michael agreed easily. They’ve had dinner together before. When they were alone it was usually pizza or some other type or fast food. So when Michael arrived and he found Jeremy in the kitchen, something was up.

“You’re cooking?” Michael exclaimed. Jeremy huffed in reply at Michael’s surprised outburst.  
“Don’t sound so surprised,” Jeremy murmured. Michael laughed and ruffled Jeremy’s hair as he entered the kitchen.  
“You’re making pasta?” Michael questioned. Jeremy nodded. He handed Michael a small knife and a tomato. Michael began cutting it without second thought. They worked together silently, cleaning and cutting the vegetables and making them into the sauce.  
“Thought you always ordered fast food when your dad’s gone,” Michael said. Jeremy shrugged.  
“I wanted to make something nice for once. And besides, now you’re here,” he trailed off.  
“I’m fine with Pizza too,” Michael said gently. Jeremy smiled.  
“I know. But this is nice, right?” he asked. Michael nodded. Jeremy smiled and carried on.

While Jeremy was bowling the pasta, Michael set the table. They never really used plates or a table, they usually sat on the floor and ate from the pizza boxes. But now Michael had two plates and two cups facing each other. It made everything a bit domestic.  
“Do you think the pasta is done?” Jeremy called from the kitchen. Michael walked over, pushing Jeremy away from the bowling pasta.  
“Thought you were the chef,” he teased, as he took a spaghetti strand out to test. Jeremy had walked away however.  
“Jeremy!” Michael yelled.  
“You’re my co chef!” Jeremy yelled back. Michael sighed and shook his head as he turned the stove off. 

“Can I put on music?” Jeremy called.  
“Yeah sure,” Michael replied, carrying the bowl of spaghetti towards the table. What he saw had him nearly dropping it. See Michael had set the table, but he had not lit candles and had not put on slow music. That was all on Jeremy. Michael stood frozen, still carrying the bowl when Jeremy saw him.  
“Oh, is it heavy, do you need a hand?” Jeremy walked towards him. The last thing Michael needed was Jeremy touching him. He shook his head and took a step backwards as he set it down on the table quickly. He didn’t know the music, but recognized it was Ed Sheeran from how often Brooke had been blasting it. By the slow pace, romantic lyrics it might as well have been Careless Whisper in Michael’s eyes. 

“Is the music okay? Brooke said I had to listen to his new album but I can put something else on if you want to,” Jeremy rushed when he noticed Michael listening.  
“It’s fine,” Michael said tightly, though he felt like he might die. Jeremy nodded, going to the kitchen to get the pasta sauce. Michael reached for his phone quickly.

To Rich:  
I am going insane.

“Hopefully it’s okay, we can still order something if it sucks,” Jeremy continued self consciously. Michael had a hard time focussing on anything Jeremy said, as he was too distracted by the CANDLELIT DINNER he was having with Jeremy.  
“Why are there candles?” Michael asked uselessly. Jeremy snorted but his cheeks turned bright red.  
“Sorry, the normal lights were so bright and I couldn’t find smaller ones. So I thoughts ‘candles will do.’ Is it weird?” It’s not weird at all, Michael thought. Just coupley as hell.  
“No, it’s fine,” Michael assured him. He started eating, just to have something to do. He didn’t know if he wanted this moment to last forever or to be over right this second. Everything about Jeremy made him feel bittersweet. He wanted to be around him all the time but at the same time couldn’t handle being around him. 

“It’s pretty good, Heere,” Michael told him. Jeremy nodded and took a bite himself. They ended in comfortable silence again, though Michael couldn’t help the nerves in his stomach. Sure, he was content with staying friends with Jeremy and leaving it at that. But that didn’t change how he was having dinner with Jeremy, with candles and ed sheeran on the background. The universe was testing him. His phone buzzed as Jeremy headed to the kitchen to look for ice cream.

From Rich:  
What did he do now

To Rich:  
Pasta. With candles. And music.

From Rich:  
Oh man 

From Rich:  
Are you reenacting lady and the tramp

Michael put his phone away with red cheeks quickly. He didn’t need the visuals of doing that with Jeremy. What he needed was some casual friendly, friend time. No romantic undertones. No candles. Just normal friendly Jeremy time.  
“Hey wanna game till we pass out?” Michael asked when Jeremy sat down. Jeremy raised his eyebrow but nodded. 

Yes, Michael thought as they were back in their old habits, gaming, yelling at each other while gaming, Jeremy rambling about whatever came to his mind. That’s what he needed, this was what’s right.

*****  
Rich nearly sprinted towards him the next week. He slammed Michael against the wall a little roughly. For a split second Michael felt that dread. The dread he felt whenever Rich or some other popular kid would look at him. But then Rich started talking in his usual lisp and Michael relaxed.  
“Tell me about your date,” Rich urged immediately. Michael felt his face heat up. He pushed Rich away and started walking to class. Rich followed him.  
“It wasn’t a date,” Michael said. He didn’t know if that made him sad or relieved.  
“Dinner with candles while parents are out of town sounds like a date,” Rich argued. Michael groaned.  
“I don’t think he notices,” Michael said sadly. Rich snorted.  
“Come on, he’s not that oblivious, right?” Michael gave him a look. Rich’s face fell.  
“Oh shit.”  
“Yes.”

Rich became invested in the situation. Michael would text, call or see him on school and tell him about his latest Jeremy dates-but-they’re-not-dates. Michael imagined Rich sitting with popcorn as he listened to Michael whine about it.  
“I am in hell. We went to the cinema and he wouldn’t let me pay for my own ticket. Then we go and he fucking lays his head on my shoulder because he was tired. And he sat like that the entire movie.”  
“This is painful just listening to it.” This went on for weeks.

It was around 2am when Michael’s phone rang. After the third ring he answered it, eyes still closed and voice thick with sleep.  
“Yeah?”  
“Do you want to get high?” Michael’s eyes flew open and he sat up quickly.  
“Jeremy?”  
“I can’t sleep.” He sounded in distress, scared almost. Jeremy never called this late so something had to be wrong.  
“I can be there in 10,” Michael said, already getting out of bed.  
“Actually, can you come outside? I’m in your backyard,” Jeremy said. Michael paused. Jeremy had come to his house, at 2am in the morning. Dread filled his stomach.  
“Okay, I’ll get the stuff,” Michael said.  
“Okay bye.” Jeremy ended the call. Michael stared at his feet for another moment before putting on pants and getting his weed.

He found Jeremy indeed sitting in his backyard. He was sitting with his knees pulled up to his chest and a weird look in his eyes.  
“Dude,” Michael whispered. Jeremy looked at him and smiled. Though the smile didn’t reach his eyes. Michael sat down next to him and waited for Jeremy to talk. Jeremy’s eyes were red and puffy but he didn’t seem to want to talk. Michael lit the joint and handed it over after taking a hit himself. Jeremy took it with cold fingers.  
“How long have you been sitting here, Jeremy?” Jeremy shrugged. He handed Michael the joint again. They sat and smoked in silence. Michael noticed Jeremy was shivering and opened his arms for Jeremy to crawl into. Jeremy did, rubbing his face into Michael’s hoodie.  
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled quietly. “I just had a nightmare and I didn’t know what to do.” Michael shushed him and pulled Jeremy closer.  
“It’s okay. Whatever you need, I’m your man, yeah?” Jeremy nodded. They sat quietly until Jeremy pointed upwards to the sky.  
“Look at the stars,” he said sleepily. Michael did, finishing the Coldplay lyrics in his head.  
“They’re pretty,” Jeremy continued. Michael nodded in agreement. He was painfully aware of Jeremy’s sleepy body pressed against him as they sat outside watching the stars. 

Jeremy reached out for Michael’s hand. He took it in his with soft careful hands. Slowly but surely he started rubbing his thumb up and down the back of Michael’s hand. Michael squeezed his hand in reply.  
“It’s time to go to bed,” Michael said softly. Jeremy nodded. He turned around in Michael’s arms, facing him. One of his hands went to Michael’s neck. Michael’s breath hitched. Jeremy smiled at him slightly before moving in. Oh my god. Michael forgot how to breathe and didn’t dare to move as Jeremy’s face came closer to his. He’s going to kiss me, he’s going to kiss me, the voice in his head told him. He should just go with it. If Jeremy wanted this, who was he to stop it? Hell, he was going to kiss Jeremy. Jeremy was going to kiss him.

Jeremy’s hand curled around the back of Michael’s head and pulled it against his shoulder, moving his own face into Michael’s neck. A hug. The cold disappointment came so hard emotions flared up in Michael’s throat. He swallowed away the hurt and returned the embrace.  
“Thank you, Michael,” Jeremy told him.  
“No problem,” Michael squeaked, trying to ignore his still racing heart. It took him an hour to fall asleep that night. 

******  
“Stargazing, since when is Jeremy a romcom cliché?” Rich asked him loudly after school. Michael slapped his arm as Jake was still walking with them. Rich gave him an offended look.  
“What, Jake knows about it,” he said. Michael’s head went bright red. Jake turned to him with a smile.  
“You told him?”  
“Come on, I had to share this with someone, it was painful keeping it inside,” Rich whined.  
“Imagine how it must be for me,” Michael complained. Jake gave him a sympathetic pat on the shoulders.  
“It’s gonna be okay, I’m sure- Jeremy!” he yelled when Jeremy noticed them. Jeremy walked over with Christine, both smiling. Michael forced away his jealousy. 

“Hey! Where are you guys headed?” Jake asked.  
“I was showing Jeremy the new play the school’s doing. I asked if he wanted to join..” she trailed off. Jeremy was shaking his head heavily. Michael snorted.  
“I don’t think anyone’s up for joining a play anytime soon,” he said. Jeremy rolled his eyes and gestured at Christine.  
“I told her. She’s the only one who still wants to!”  
“Because I actually did it for the play last time, unlike….” Christine teased.  
“Bye Christine!” Jeremy called loudly, walking up to Michael and throwing his arm around his shoulder.  
“Rude!” Christine called back with a laugh. 

Michael was surprised with the action. Jeremy before would never do such a thing. Now he and Christine were actually comfortable together, teasing each other even and he still came back to Michael. Rich raised an eyebrow at them.  
“Nice way to make us the third wheel again,” he said. Jeremy rolled his eyes.  
“Fuck off.” Michael grinned and let himself be pulled along with Jeremy.  
“Didn’t you want to hang out with Christine?” Michael questioned. Jeremy shook his head.  
“I’ve seen her everyday this week. I think that’s enough.”  
“You’ve seen me everyday this week too,” Michael argued. Jeremy shrugged.  
“I don’t get tired of you, I guess.” Michael’s heart jumped. “Besides,” Jeremy continued.  
“I like Christine, but we’re just friends.” Michael nodded, trying to understand why this was relevant. 

All was back to normal after that. Jeremy was his usual clingy self, but Michael didn’t feel like he was thrown into a romantic movie every time they were alone together. So when Jeremy came with the idea to go to the beach, he didn’t think much of it. He also wasn’t too bothered when no one could make it.  
“I have my pedicure today, sorry,” was Chloe’s reason, meaning it was also Brooke’s.  
“No thanks,” was all Jenna said. Christine had to rehearsal and Rich and Jake had plans they were being weirdly vague about. 

And so he and Jeremy went together. It was all the usual stuff. Michael noticed the slight abs on Jeremy’s body. When Jeremy caught him noticing, he turned away self consciously. They spent most of the time in the water and were just drying in the sun when Michael felt it. A drop of water on his forehead. He opened his eyes and stared at the grey sky above him. Jeremy seemed to feel the drops as well. They shared a moment of dread filled eye contact. It was already too late when they decided to get going as the rain came pouring down.  
“No no no!” Jeremy yelled. “We’ve got to get to your car, where did you park it?”  
“Dammit Jeremy it’s on the other side of the beach!”  
“Fuck!” 

After running like their life defended on it, they reached Michael’s car, soaking wet. Both shivering, Michael turned on the car and turned the heater up.  
“Well, I’m never picking what we should do ever again,” Jeremy said seriously. Michael busted out laughing so hard it felt like it was coming from his toes. Jeremy joined him.  
“Yeah laugh, I was just trying to have a nice day!” Jeremy complained. Michael tried to stop his laughter, putting his hand in front of his mouth.  
“Sorry,” he said. Both of them looked like drowned cats because of the rain. Jeremy sat up and tugged his shirt over his head.  
“I’m freezing,” he said, as explanation. He turned up the heater a little again. 

Michael had a hard time not staring again. Jeremy caught him.  
“What is it?” he pushed his arms in front of his chest. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Michael poked Jeremy’s arm.  
“I did.” Jeremy shoved him. Michael giggled. Jeremy attacked him for it.  
“Kidding!” Jeremy pulled back with a satisfied smile. “Your skin is nice, I like your skin,” Michael assured him. Jeremy’s face went soft. Jeremy’s eyes trailed down his body.  
“I like your skin too,” he said in a soft voice. Michael’s body felt on fire. Even as the ice cold wet clothes clung to his chest. 

Just focus, he told himself. Count to 10.  
“You should take your shirt off too,” Jeremy said. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10  
“I’m fine like this, thanks.” Jeremy didn’t seem content with this as he leaned into Michael’s space. As his cold hand touched the end of Michael’s shirt, Michael caught his wrist. Count to 10, count to 10, keep breathing.  
“What are you doing?” Michael breathed, panic in his words. Jeremy furrowed his brows.  
“You’ll be less cold.” Michael didn’t give damn about being cold. Jeremy needed to stay away from him right this second.  
“I’m not cold,” Michael argued but Jeremy didn’t move out of his space. He simply kept staring at Michael. If he didn’t leave now, he was going to do something very very dumb that would ruin things. Michael squeezed the steering wheel and turned on the engine. 

“Let’s go home,” he said through gritted teeth. The sentence was cut short by Jeremy’s mouth on his. Jeremy’s hand cupped his cheek and pulled his face towards him gently. Michael had a hard time functioning. When Jeremy pulled away shyly and looked at him, Michael knew he should probably say something. But Jeremy’s flushed cheeks, his mouth hanging open, his eyes flicking back and forth between Michael’s eyes and lips. He couldn’t do this. He pulled Jeremy into his lap quickly, and he went willingly. Their mouths found each other again, desperately, like maybe Jeremy had been suffering as much as Michael had. Michael tangled one of his hands in Jeremy’s hair, while the other one settled on his hip. Jeremy let out a noise against his lips as Michael tugged on his hair.

Michael smiled and did it again, resulting in Jeremy moaning quietly. He pulled away from Michael breathlessly.  
“Is this happening?” he whispered. Michael nodded and kissed him again. Now that he had tasted Jeremy, he would go crazy if he stopped for a second. Jeremy kept making noises against his mouth and he slowly moved his hips into Michael. This made Michael aware of their situation again. They were in a car, in public. He pulled away, pushing Jeremy away as he chased his lips.  
“Let’s go home for real, yeah?” he whispered. Jeremy shook his head, trying to get another kiss. Michael chuckled and pushed his face away.  
“I don’t wanna go home,” Jeremy said a little desperately. Michael smiled. He stroked Jeremy’s cheek softly.  
“We can continue this when we’re home. Or any other day from now on,” Michael assured him. Jeremy bit his lip. He toyed with the end of Michael’s wet t shirt.  
“Promise?” Michael bit his lip to contain his smile. He nodded.  
“Promise.”

From Rich:  
Any updates on the Heere drama??? We’re curious

To Rich:  
Ya we made out

From Rich:  
WHAT  
MICHAEl  
What!!??  
YOU CAN’T JUST SAY THAT AND NOT RESPOND  
MICHael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this, it was a little all over the place
> 
> I might write a 'sequel' where the squad knows and they're couply while actually being a couple. Let me know if y'all are up for that. 
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading and find me on tumblr @ softandpersistent.tumblr.com

**Author's Note:**

> Hi ok so i've read every bmc fic and i just kept thinking how awful this must be for michael bc jeremy's so cute all the time. So I wrote this. More to come but now i'm gonna sleep.
> 
> find me @ softandpersistent.tumblr.com


End file.
